U.S. BIRTH GRAPH, 1946-1962 (revised)
behind a decommissioned half-track
on the kitchen table, the radio blaring
in the middle of a raspberry u-pick
while waiting at a railway crossing
ten minutes into a twenty-minute nap
inspired by a new and improved design
at a time of global economic certainty
with no thought given to the neighbours
despite recent gains in public awareness
beside the window, the television blaring
under the influence of Lysol Disinfectant
between a glass of wine and a box of novels
eight days before the next menstrual cycle
immediately following the six o’clock news
against all odds – and a latticework fence
where demand for reconciliation appears low
towards the advancement of colored people
below a yellowing photo of John Bell Hood
beyond what passes for stasis and change
*
Last week I asked a poet I know to critique my poem "U.S. Birth Graph, 1946-1964" (posted on Saturday). She had a number of comments, most of them focused on my use of personal pronouns, how they created confusion. While I am interested in confusion, I decided to rewrite the poem without these pronouns, using the same constraint as in the previous version.
Readers will note that the revised poem uses both Canadian and U.S. spellings, as well as the Canadian "railway" over the U.S. "railroad". My use of the Canadian spelling of "neighbourhood" comes from a Canadian education; my use of the U.S. spelling of "colored" is based on its referent: the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), an organization that continues to this day.
I am still not happy with this poem (particularly the last line) and will likely make further changes. If any should come to mind, please let me know.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Saturday, April 7, 2012
U.S. BIRTH GRAPH, 1946-1964
behind a decommissioned half-track
on the kitchen table, the radio blaring
in the middle of a raspberry u-pick
while waiting at a railway crossing
twenty minutes into a five mile hike
at the wedding of his younger brother
at the completion of her baccalaureate
beside the window, with no one watching
under the influence of Burson-Marsteller
with his mother coming up the front steps
with her father in the back pruning a fig
between a bowl of chips and a box of novels
eight days before the next menstrual cycle
immediately following the six o’clock news
against all odds – and a latticework fence
with her on her knees and him on assignment
below a yellowing photo of Joseph Kennedy
towards the advancement of colored people
behind the times and besides the changes
*
The above poem began as a horizontal bar graph of live births recorded in the United States between 1946-1964, what is known as the Baby Boom.
For my part I have taken these numbers and, using a 1:100,000 ratio, replaced them with characters and the spaces in-between words. For example, if there were 4.3 million live births in 1957, then I have given myself 43 spaces to come up with a line (“with his mother coming up the front steps").
As for the content of the poem, you might have guessed that each line is an instance where conception could have taken place, and that the sequence could be described as a narrative.
A problem I had in composing this poem concerned the representation of fractions, as eight of the years/lines are in the tens of thousands. Because I am not interested in creating 1/10th of a letter (see Donato Mancini for that) I applied the fraction to the spacing of the fractioned line, something that will require a designer. As for the dash, while it requires two hyphens to make, it appears here as a single uninterrupted mark.
behind a decommissioned half-track
on the kitchen table, the radio blaring
in the middle of a raspberry u-pick
while waiting at a railway crossing
twenty minutes into a five mile hike
at the wedding of his younger brother
at the completion of her baccalaureate
beside the window, with no one watching
under the influence of Burson-Marsteller
with his mother coming up the front steps
with her father in the back pruning a fig
between a bowl of chips and a box of novels
eight days before the next menstrual cycle
immediately following the six o’clock news
against all odds – and a latticework fence
with her on her knees and him on assignment
below a yellowing photo of Joseph Kennedy
towards the advancement of colored people
behind the times and besides the changes
*
The above poem began as a horizontal bar graph of live births recorded in the United States between 1946-1964, what is known as the Baby Boom.
For my part I have taken these numbers and, using a 1:100,000 ratio, replaced them with characters and the spaces in-between words. For example, if there were 4.3 million live births in 1957, then I have given myself 43 spaces to come up with a line (“with his mother coming up the front steps").
As for the content of the poem, you might have guessed that each line is an instance where conception could have taken place, and that the sequence could be described as a narrative.
A problem I had in composing this poem concerned the representation of fractions, as eight of the years/lines are in the tens of thousands. Because I am not interested in creating 1/10th of a letter (see Donato Mancini for that) I applied the fraction to the spacing of the fractioned line, something that will require a designer. As for the dash, while it requires two hyphens to make, it appears here as a single uninterrupted mark.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
SYNESTHESIA
coffee is no longer where it comes from, but how
when the ends are increasingly assumed
ethics you can taste, politics on the tip of your tongue
the roof of the mouth is still a roof like ketchup was a vegetable
food and shelter -- the irreducible minimum – and from this seed
a stadium, the welfare state, with its own lip services paid for
by Postwar Economic Growth, the team that keeps on winning
the United States the Globetrotters, the Generals Everyone Else
not a cosmos but a line ascending, the straighter the better
like those Apollo rockets and their ferocious lift-offs
not The Economy we were watching but a rehearsal
of that which has become a tendency to associate rockets
with economies, not the opposite of bombs dropped
concurrently on Hanoi, Nam Dinh and Viet Tri
but the appearance of an opposite
because what was sent to the moon
and what fell on North Vietnam
was the coffee mom bought at the supermarket
the loss-leader bananas that lured her there
coffee still comes from the same places
but it is the treatment of its pickers
that gives it its taste
coffee is no longer where it comes from, but how
when the ends are increasingly assumed
ethics you can taste, politics on the tip of your tongue
the roof of the mouth is still a roof like ketchup was a vegetable
food and shelter -- the irreducible minimum – and from this seed
a stadium, the welfare state, with its own lip services paid for
by Postwar Economic Growth, the team that keeps on winning
the United States the Globetrotters, the Generals Everyone Else
not a cosmos but a line ascending, the straighter the better
like those Apollo rockets and their ferocious lift-offs
not The Economy we were watching but a rehearsal
of that which has become a tendency to associate rockets
with economies, not the opposite of bombs dropped
concurrently on Hanoi, Nam Dinh and Viet Tri
but the appearance of an opposite
because what was sent to the moon
and what fell on North Vietnam
was the coffee mom bought at the supermarket
the loss-leader bananas that lured her there
coffee still comes from the same places
but it is the treatment of its pickers
that gives it its taste
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